Naomi – An Embittered Woman Comforted - Selah

Introduction

The book of Ruth is a rich tapestry of the sovereignty, grace and mercy of God displayed through His workings not only in the life of Ruth, but also her mother-in-law, Naomi. The saying that ‘God moves in mysterious ways, His wonders to perform’ is particularly highlighted in this book as we see the lives of these two women, from two different nations interweaved together as part of God’s unfolding plan for salvation. Amazingly, even at micro level of this plan, God reveals His compassion, care and comfort for these two women, each of whom experienced tragedy and uncertainty in difficult times. As we look at Naomi’s story, we see how through tragic loss she became affected by bitterness and how God in His grace comforted and restored her.

Overview on Naomi

Although the Scripture passages on Naomi flow throughout the book of Ruth, which will not take long to read, for the purposes of this discussion the relevant Scriptures are mainly Ruth chapter 1 and chapter 4:13-22. From these passages we learn that:

Naomi lived in the times when the judges still ruled (Ruth 1:1) and as we saw in the discussion on Deborah – A Woman who Served these were difficult and uncertain times (recall Judges 2:11-23);
she was married and originally lived in Bethlehem, Judah with her husband and two sons (Ruth 1:2);
her husband decided to relocate the whole family to Moab due to famine which came upon the land (Ruth 1:1);
sometime after moving to Moab she became a widow and was left with her two sons (Ruth 2:3);
her sons chose Moabite women as wives (Ruth 1:4). This perhaps in time brought some solace as there is the suggestion that they were not bad wives to her sons or daughters-in-law to herself (Ruth 1:8)– despite their origins. Moab and Israel were not on the friendliest of terms;
Naomi later suffered the loss of both her sons (Ruth 1:5) – having lost her husband and now all her children she is indeed grieved and becomes embittered;
after discovering that the famine in Judah is over and she decides to return to her home in Bethlehem (Ruth 1:6);
she began the journey with both her daughters-in-law but has a change of heart along the way and plans to return alone, encouraging Orpah and Ruth to return to their own families (see Ruth 1:7-8). Seeing Ruth’s resoluteness to stick with her, Naomi agrees to her accompanying her back to Bethlehem (Ruth 1:14-18);
she returns home, still carrying the bitterness of her loss in her heart (Ruth 1:19-21) – not yet recognising the provision the Lord had made for her;
as the story of Ruth unfolds, Naomi comes to see the comfort in the kindness of the LORD unfold (Ruth 2:20) and the comfort in the final healing of her grief with the marriage of Ruth to her relative Boaz and the birth of their son (Ruth 4:13-22).

At times when we read about a tragedy we do not always take the time to break it down bit by bit – as far as our minds will enable us – to get as near to empathy as we can that we might understand the enormity of what has happened. When we consider Naomi’s loss in this way one can still only imagine the depth of distress, anguish, anxiety, anger, bitterness, resentfulness, sense of hopelessness she must have passed through in the dawning realisation of the reality of her circumstances. She was as human as you and I and therefore we can at the very least understand her reaction – though hasty – at Ruth 1:20-21, spoken in the bitterness of her grieved spirit.

We may not have experienced such a tragedy as Naomi did, but there cannot be many of us that have not had a brush with bitterness, over our circumstances, towards others and perhaps even towards God. It may not necessarily be on our own behalf alone, but even as with Naomi for the sake of someone else (Ruth 1:13c). We know how easily bitterness can sneak up on us and no matter how we may try to deny it to others we cannot honestly deny it to ourselves. When all the protests and excuses have been made, when there is no else around except you and your conviction – because we will be under conviction if we are a child of God (it’s just a matter of time) – we will know the bitterness in our heart.

Why is this a relevant issue for us?

The short answer is that Scripture tells us it is – consider Ephesians 4:31 (verses 17-32 for context) and Hebrews 12:14-15. If it were something we didn’t need to be aware of as believers, the admonition in these Scriptures would not have been written.

A longer answer for consideration is this: Bitterness can grow easily where there is disappointment, unfairness, wickedness, distress, adversity, tragedy and so on. History teaches the painful lesson that when the times are characterised by such things bitterness of heart abounds.

There is no doubt that we are in the last days and were forewarned that these times will come (e.g. 2 Timothy 3:1-5) which the enemy of our souls would seek to use, if possible, to shoot his poisonous arrows of bitterness straight into our hearts. We are forewarned by our Lord Yeshua that ‘because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold’ (Matthew 24:12). We can praise the Lord that when we see these things begin to happen, we can look up because our redemption draws nears (Luke 21:28) but until it comes, we still have to live in this world. As with Naomi, today we live in times of uncertainty and difficulty. As in Naomi’s days we live in a time where most people in the world (and even some in the professing Church) does what is right in their own eyes (see Judges 21:25). We can be grieved when we open the newspapers. We can be grieved even just walking down the street. We can be grieved at work or by no work. We can be grieved on account of family and friends who still walk in darkness and, sadly, even by those who are in the Light. We may still have to deal with bitterness and the battle to get the victory over it in and through Lord Yeshua. Depending on the root cause, it may be an enormous struggle and it may not necessarily be over as quickly as we would wish. Nevertheless, we can resist the devil’s temptation to be overtaken by seeking Lord Yeshua to keep our hearts softened before Him, towards Him and in Him or dwell in bitterness. In and through the power of the Spirit of God there is an expected end for us and to each one of us a promised grace for restoration in Yeshua.

Naomi’s Legacy

The following are a few things from Naomi’s experience that we can add to our own “jewels and treasures” of Scripture passages to help keep us in the place where we can continue to be strengthened in the grace of God when struggling with bitterness.

Don’t remain in that moment

Let’s reconsider Naomi’s hasty words at Ruth 1:19-21:

Now the two of them went until they came to Bethlehem. And it happened, when they had come to Bethlehem, that all the city was excited because of them; and the women said, “Is this Naomi?” But she said to them, “Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went out full, and the Lord has brought me home again empty. Why do you call me Naomi, since the Lord has testified against me, and the Almighty has afflicted me?”

Let us not blame God. Before we gasp and exclaim with a wide eyed “who me?” – yes us! We have all done this – whether overtly or covertly, explicitly or effectively. Have you never asked the Lord ‘why?’ ‘Why have You allowed this to happen?’ ‘Why do I have to go through this – again!” Have you never said or heard words to the effect of (and usually in very “pious” tones), ‘It has not pleased the Lord to give me……[whatever is that we didn’t get]’ only to come to realise later what we were really saying is ‘it’s Your fault God and it’s not fair – You’re not fair.’ I would like to suggest that we have all had our part in this at some point or another. Even some of our prayers can seem to almost have an accusatory whiff to them at times!

As believers we believe, accept and stand on the truth that God is in control – there is not one thing, no, not one, that is in control of God. Have we ever complained? Grumbled? Whined? Sulked? Felt discontent? Note Naomi’s words again:

“..for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me.”

“I went out full, and the LORD has brought me home again empty..”

“…the LORD has testified against me..”

“..the Almighty has afflicted me.”

Do you think the Lord is angry at us because we experience a moment of bitterness in spirit because of grievous calamity or a moment of weakness? Get real folks – it does happen! Nothing is worse when you are going through a time of deep distress and an undiscerning brother or sister comes along and asks where your joy is! There are times when it is okay to have that moment – and I stress the word ‘moment’ – to take everything in, to feel, to process it all and then to go on to experience the healing work of the grace of God. Consider for example 2 Kings 4:8-27, noting verse 27 in particular that Elisha, the man of God, did not rebuke the Shunammite woman in her “moment.”

The problem for us is when we remain in that “moment” and when we allow a root of bitterness to take hold and so what should have only been a moment becomes the norm. How heart-breaking it is when we hear of those who at such a time turned their backs on God instead of their hearts, having allowed bitterness to go so far as to blind them to truth and so blamed God. If only they had waited, if only they had pressed through to the other side of that “moment” to see the ever faithful, ever constant unchanging heavenly Father and our compassionate High Priest, Yeshua who is “touched with the feeling of our infirmities” (Hebrews 4:15 KJV). What happened? Wrong choices were made to stay in “the moment” and/or to give up fighting against its persistence and the bitterness remained until it defiled.

There Are Choices even in Distress

Note again Naomi’s words at Ruth 1:20, “Do not call me Naomi, call me Mara”

It is said that the name “Naomi” means pleasant and “Mara” means bitter. Naomi was named thus at birth presumably by her parents and so had no choice in her birth-name, but she was the one who chose to be called Mara. As mentioned above, even when we have “a moment” where for that moment we forget who we are in Christ, we do not have to choose to remain there. We can choose Yeshua and the God of all comfort or we can choose ourselves and the “comfort” of our self/flesh – either His kingdom and His righteousness or our kingdom and our self-ishness. It seems such a no-brainer doesn’t it? Obviously, we are going to choose the Lord – we are Spirit-born believers right? Obviously, we are going to choose His kingdom and His righteousness – we are Spirit-filled believers right? Praise the Lord and Amen! However, it may just be that in the bitterness of deeply grieving circumstances – we will come face to face with a deeper reality of what Paul writes about in Galatians 5:17. The place where we learn how powerful and wilful our flesh is; that it is hard for the flesh to die – and stay dead; that our flesh can be even more grieving that the situation that grieved us in the first place! We come to learn that it is no wonder that Paul writes at Romans 8:13, ‘For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.’

There is only One more powerful than the power of our flesh and He is God. We can choose to yield to the Holy Spirit of God or choose to yield to what our flesh wants. Quite often it does not even take a deeply traumatic event such as Naomi experienced for us to know we are being required by present circumstances to make a choice.

We can choose to be a “Mara” and feel that God ought to have dealt better with us that we think He has done – as if God owes us something. Though unstated, it was nevertheless implied in Naomi’s ‘call me Mara’ statement – as is usually the case of bitterness. Should we ever choose to misadventure down that road, out of the many Scriptures verses we will find waiting to greet us, the words from 1 Corinthians 4:7 should be a great help. This states, ‘And what do you have that you did not receive?’ God is a debtor to no man and what anything we receive is purely grace.

Alternatively, we can choose to be a “Naomi” and humbly ask of the Lord for grace that, as one Minister used to say, we would “honour God in the trial.”

Thankfully for the real Naomi, her chosen name “Mara” did not stick as that name was never referred to again throughout the book of Ruth.

Remember Who we have been given by God

There came a point in Naomi’s life when she was able to recall the attribute of kindness that belongs to God (see Ruth 2:20). It is good for us to remember – and remember often – who our God is to us, particularly in times of distress and just as David did, to encourage ourselves in the Lord our God (see 1 Samuel 30:6b). We can take time every now and then to go over Scriptures the Lord has used to encourage and strengthen us that we may recall His kindness with thankfulness which by His grace through His Spirit will keep our hearts softened. It is hard for a heart kept soft to become bitter.

In just one such example at Romans 8:26-39, we also can see the living and biblical truth that in Yeshua our Lord:

God is for us (Romans 8:31). As a child of God, no-one and nothing can prevail against us, regardless of what things may look like now, or in the future. As we remain in Yeshua the Messiah and He remains in us, not one thing, in the end, can prevail. May we, by grace, hold on to this.
By and in the will of God, the Holy Spirit makes intercession for us as believers in Messiah as we live according to the Spirit (Romans 8:26).
God causes ‘all things [to] work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose’ (Romans 8:28). We can know that we love God by our obedience to His will for us and that as Spirit-born believers, by His grace we are among “the called”. Therefore even though we may not see it with our physical eyes and even though we may not understand how, we can believe by faith that God will make all the “strands” of all the trials, all the sorrow, all the ‘deficits’ in our lives work together for good.
We are destined to win as we continue in trust, faith and obedience to God. We can know this because God has pre-destined every Spirit-born believer ‘to be conformed to the image of His Son’ (Romans 8:29). Not even a moment of bitterness in spirit is going to stop that – because we will not, indeed cannot, remain in it. When you are in distress – physically, mentally, emotionally or even spiritually – every second can seem like an hour. It is not forever. It is subject to change – because God says so and caused these promises to be recorded in so many places in the Scriptures, including in this verse.
God has and will provide everything we need to ‘fight the good fight of faith, to run the race and finish the course’. We can know this to be true because it is written at Romans 8:32, ‘He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things.’ When we are feeling down about things, when we are frustrated with ourselves for stumbling, whenever we wonder whether we will ever make it, we need to remind ourselves that Yeshua the Messiah, our Lord and Saviour has ‘made it’ already for us. In this we can rejoice!
In Christ, no charge will stick! It is God who justifies us (Romans 8:33). In Christ, there is no condemnation for us ‘who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit’ (Romans 8:1). Why? It is written at Romans 8:34, ‘It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right and of God, who also makes intercession for us
There is absolutely nothing that can separate us from the love of God which is in Yeshua the Messiah, our Lord. We can believe this to be true because it is written at Romans 8:35-39 and from Genesis to Revelation we see this to be so. You may wish to read through these particular verses, taking in how every verse that overflows with grace and love from Almighty God to each one of us who belongs to Lord Yeshua.

Prayer – A ‘Cure’ for a troubled mind

Praying in faith the word of God with faith enabled by the Holy Spirit is one of the greatest cures for a troubled mind. Consider, for example what is being expressed at Ephesians 3:14-19.

We too can bow our knees for others and for ourselves to ask our heavenly Father, who is rich in mercy:

To strengthen them/us with might through His Spirit, in their/our inner man. Have you considered what God’s might means? At the very least it will enable us to endure unto victory through faith!
For Christ to dwell in their/our hearts through faith. Consider – it is Christ Himself that dwells within us!
That they/we be rooted and grounded in God’s love.
That they/we be able to comprehend with all the saints, what is the width and length and depth and height and know the love of Christ that passes knowledge. This includes a request for maturing faith since faith is the only means by which we can know His love that passes knowledge.
That they/we be filled with all the fullness of God. The fullness of God is absolute and perfect provision for this season.

As we draw near to the Lord, having prepared and purposed in our hearts to leave the outcome in His hands, the troubled mind (and heart) will be cured.

God is indeed the God of All Comfort

At Ruth 4:14-15 we see in the words of praises by Naomi’s friends and neighbours such a portrait of the riches of the grace of the God of all comfort. God did not leave Naomi without a redeemer (the word translated as ‘close relative’ is “goel” in Hebrew which means “redeemer”). In the blessing of new life through Ruth’s baby, at last comes the clarity for Naomi that all along the Lord had made a provision for comfort for Naomi in Ruth. She could not see this at first when she left Moab but at the last, even her friends came to see that this was so. Listen to their words, ’for your daughter-in-law, who loves you who is better to you than seven sons’ (Ruth 4:15). One can imagine that, as recorded at verse 16, as ‘Naomi took the child and laid him on her bosom and became a nurse to him’ that she finally knew the completed work of the healing and comfort of God. Praise the Lord!

Conclusion

If there is one key lesson that we can take from Naomi story it is surely to never forget to look out for the comfort of God when we are in distress – no matter how bitter that distress is. It will be there. He, Yeshua the Lord is there. Life is tough and the reality is it is going to get tougher than many of us have yet known, especially those of us living in the Western world. I have no doubt there we will see and experience distressing times both through pressures from the world system and within the professing Church. Nevertheless, may we by the grace of God be enabled to know more of the conscious awareness of His presence with us through His Spirit in Messiah Yeshua our Lord.

Let us determine afresh, today and perhaps even before we see any troubling thing on the horizon, not to allow the difficulty of circumstances to blind us to an unchanging truth encapsulated by Psalm 46:1:

‘God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.’

The whole psalm is wonderful for meditation, but these two lines alone are enough.

God bless you.